I know that for me, the burning desire to meet my biologicals was simple - the reason, both on the surface and below was no more complicated than that they held lots of pieces of me that I knew I wanted to own. Full stop. No psychoanalyzing necessary. I know there are people out there who did not grow up with their biologicals and don't care, don't want to meet them (I do envy them a bit if they aren't actually in denial and truly don't care), but that is not me and I think I know you well enough through our decades-long (!) friendship to say that is not you - and it's one of the many reasons why I love you so <3
Oh, yes, that is exactly it...Thank you for giving me a break from being hard on myself for this desire. For pathologizing it, for feeling like I'm not entitled to want this.
Of course I'd want to know. I'm curious about EVERYTHING. Like you.
And yes, I sometimes wish I were just like "huh, okay"--not just about this, but lots of things. But that would mean I'd have to be an entirely different person. And I can't, and don't want to be.
I know that for me, the burning desire to meet my biologicals was simple - the reason, both on the surface and below was no more complicated than that they held lots of pieces of me that I knew I wanted to own. Full stop. No psychoanalyzing necessary. I know there are people out there who did not grow up with their biologicals and don't care, don't want to meet them (I do envy them a bit if they aren't actually in denial and truly don't care), but that is not me and I think I know you well enough through our decades-long (!) friendship to say that is not you - and it's one of the many reasons why I love you so <3
Oh, yes, that is exactly it...Thank you for giving me a break from being hard on myself for this desire. For pathologizing it, for feeling like I'm not entitled to want this.
Of course I'd want to know. I'm curious about EVERYTHING. Like you.
And yes, I sometimes wish I were just like "huh, okay"--not just about this, but lots of things. But that would mean I'd have to be an entirely different person. And I can't, and don't want to be.
I love you xoxo