5 Comments

It seems you’re doing what you can right now and that’s all you can do. And processing, lord knows how long processing can take. I love the response about rising from ashes . I struggled after my brother‘s death, because he had been cremated and for the for the first time I understood why Catholics didn’t cremate. I like the idea of rising from ashes though. Love you

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I can imagine how strange it was, is, that his body was no longer as it was. How glad I am to have met him. He is so very you. xoxo

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((nodding)) What Rachel said. It's all a weird process that never ends. Just this morning, I thought I could turn around and talk to [my brother] Davey. Sometimes I want my cousin who recently shot himself in my aunt's yard to show up in my dreams so I can yell at him about decades of stuff.

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I talked recently about wanting my mom to be alive so I could get mad at her...And oh, Kate, so sorry about your cousin.

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Yours is the greater loss, dearest. My cousin was no loss to me but I empathized with his family who'd had different experiences of him...hell, in adulthood, even I had different experiences of him. The wish-yelling I wrote about is a...one-sided reckoning?

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