Input and Advice

from and for Donor Recipient Parents

Hi there. Coming up on a year since I found out I was donor-conceived. I am jumpy as I return to that familiar time of year. Longer days, but still cold. It’s a reminder.

At the same time, this past week I’ve had days of calmness, days when I don’t think much about being DC. Maybe I’m integrating this fact more. Also, I’m more in touch with new half-brother and had an email from the donor, so I feel less anxious. I hate that my emotions and comfort level (with myself) are affected so strongly by the actions of two men I’ve never met, especially because I am pretty sure their ways and frequency of communicating with me have little to do with the role I do/don’t occupy in their lives. (I try to remind myself of this.)

In this moment of relative equilibrium, I’d like to invite questions and comments from gamete (sperm or egg) donor recipient parents, or friends of donor recipients. I’ve talked casually with people about this but am happy to engage more directly here.

If you have a question or concern as a recipient parent, or someone connected to a recipient, please comment here, or email me (twentythreeandwtf@gmail.com) and I can address it here with complete anonymity. Tell me what you want to change in my representation of your situation and I’ll do so.

I’m not saying I have any clear answers, or even good ones, but I do believe there are best (and worst) practices and I’m curious to hear more from/about recipients. Obviously this isn’t something I talk calmly about with my mom at present.

twentythreeandwtf@gmail.com